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Da Et Atzmcha (5) Eradicating Desire- Finding Joy

With Hashem's help, we will summarize what was said until this point, and progress from there. We explained that in truth, a person is a soul, on which the body is only a garment. The soul is naturally good, but the body is the source of the evil. A person's avodah is to identify himself as a soul, and to subjugate and separate the evil from him, in its three aspects: thoughts, feelings, and actions. We explained how to separate the actions and the feelings within a person. In the recent talks, we focused on the feelings, and mentioned that to deal with negative feelings toward others, one should learn to live in the world of the "alone." A person must realize that there is a world of "alone" inside him. If a person has negative feelings toward himself, he must come to recognize that the "I" of a person is essentially good, and that these negative feelings come from the outer garments, the negative force in the person. This is how to remove the connection to evil. The positive force, the force of love, comes from a revelation of the soul, which is good. With this depth revealed, one can relate to and love another similar person, or the Creator, and feel absolute love. This is a summary of what was said until now, and we will try to go a step further.

There are other powerful distractions in the person's world of feelings: fears and concerns, whether of the known or of the unknown, depending on the situation. We must know how to deal with these. Certainly, there are secular approaches, such as when there is a concern about a war, professionals teach people how to act calmly, and similarly, explain things to people calmly, and encourage them. These approaches are very much "from the outside." What is the "inner" approach to dealing with the concerns and fears that affect each person? We will consider this in light of the depth of the power of a person's soul.

A person would not, for example, worry about losing half a shekel from his pocket. Why? Because his desire for that half shekel is very weak, so even if it is lost, he doesn't worry about it and is not concerned about it. But if someone has ten thousand or more shekalim in his pocket, normally, he would be concerned, because if they would be lost, he would feel the loss. It is a significant sum that he has in his possession. If so, let us consider and understand: if the interest in something is very weak, there is almost no concern about it becoming lost. The more there is a strong will for something, so is there a stronger concern about it being lost. The strongest fear is that a person might lose his life. There, the fear is the most powerful. If so, when dealing with fears and concerns, we must understand that the root of them all is not the fear itself, but the will regarding its object. Since he really wants it, he fears that he might not keep it. If he doesn't really want it, he doesn't fear that it might be taken away.

So a person's work to uproot the fears of the known or the unknown must start in the depth, in the root, which is the point of the ratzon (desire). How does one work with the ratzon? People have two forces of joy and peace. A person can be happy and peaceful by attaining something, or he can be happy and peaceful through his very existence. We will explain this at some length. The Rambam writes that happiness and pleasure do not come from outside a person, but from his own heart. That is where pleasure and happiness can be found.

Ratzon comes from the word ratz (run). A person runs to attain and buy something. He doesn't want to leave things as they are, but he moves, and quickly. This is called ritzah. All ratzon is ritzah; it is quick movement. It is a movement to attain something and attach it to myself. The ratzon is movement for the sake of attaining something. Why does a person want something? Most desires convince a person that when he gets what he wants, he will be happier and at peace. There are people who replace their car every two years, because they think they will feel better in the new car. If a person would know that after attaining the thing, he will not feel better, or be happier, or more at peace, he would not want it or ratz (run) to attain it. He wouldn't invest so much energy or time, and he would not make it a focus of his life. He only runs because he imagines that he will be happier and at peace when he attains the thing. This is called "joy and peace because of acquisition."

A person wants to be happy and at peace only by attaining something else that he is currently lacking. He feels now that joy and peace are lacking, and that once he will get it, he will have joy and peace. If so, the joy comes from attaining something one does not have yet. On the other hand, there is a kind of joy and peace that comes from merely existing. Chazal said of this, "Who is wealthy? He who is happy with his portion." Obviously, they were not referring to the one who has all his needs fulfilled. Rather, the person is lacking things, and yet, he is happy. But how can he be happy? He can't pay his expenses for the month! His daughter might be in the hospital! How can he be happy if he has all these troubles?

This is a joy that comes from existence. It is not a joy because one has shoes or socks. If one makes a calculation, he might decide that in fact, he lacks a lot of things, even more than what he does have. When can one really be happy? When he is happy because of his existence, not because of what he owns.

What is this joy of existence? How does one do it? What's so good about it? We must understand and consider: what is one's natural state - happy, or sad? If we decide that the natural state is one of happiness, there would need to be a cause to make one sad. If we decide, on the other hand, that the natural state is sadness, then there must be a cause to make one happy. What is one's true nature? If there would be no external forces, what would one's natural state be? Happy, or sad? For example, if you take a car and place it at an incline, the natural state of the wheels would cause it to go downward, because of gravity. Without using the breaks, it wall go downward. What is one's natural state: happy, or sad?

The answer is that a person is naturally happy! If a person is created naturally happy, he will be happy if there are no opposing factors. These factors might place one in a state of sadness. If so, why isn't a person happy? One will respond that he lacks a livelihood, or good health, or proper respect. This may be correct, but it is a very superficial attitude. The real reason one isn't happy is that he wants things besides his existence. If one would need a reason to be happy, he could claim, "Why should I be happy? I'm lacking this and that! How could I be happy?" But if one's very nature, by virtue of his creation, is to be happy, if he doesn't make himself want things, he will naturally be happy! The ratzon is the beginning of the process of uprooting joy from a person's soul. It's not as it seems to be, that one lacks and therefore is sad. Rather, because one wants things, he feels a lack, and that lack removes his natural joy. Joy is natural, and if one will just take care to not destroy himself, he will be happy.

How does one avoid destroying himself? He must live in a world without desires. Superficially, such a person would seem lifeless. Doesn't he want anything? What kind of a life is it when you don't want anything? How is it possible? The true answer is as follows: If someone lives in a three-story villa, and he is given the opportunity to live in a suffocating underground warehouse with no windows - with the option that the air conditioner will be fixed - he would say, "Thank you, but leave me alone!" If told, "What a lifeless person! You are offered a nice apartment; why don't you want it?" he would respond, "If I were a homeless person with only a bench on the street, your suggestion would in fact be charming, but why would I want a warehouse without a window in place of a three-story villa?"

If a person were asked, "Would you like us to throw stones at you?" he would say, "No!" Would they say, "You're like dead; you have no desires; you should want people to throw stones"? The answer is clear: a person only wants something if he believes that he will be better off when he gets it than he is now. But if the current state is fine, one's lack of desire does not come from inner lifelessness, but because he now has all he needs.

The problem is that we do not look at our lives as a state in which we have everything. The pasuk says, "I left my mother's womb naked, and naked I shall return." People think this is negative, because a person is born with nothing. But he's not born with nothing! A person is born with everything! However, we and the world teach the soul that "you need this, you need that." Gradually, the person is convinced that he needs and needs, and he lacks and lacks, so what was a happy person became a very needy person.

We must start looking at life from a completely different perspective. Here is a simple example: A person walks on a street and sees a very expansive sofa for sale. He immediately imagines himself sitting on the couch with a newspaper in hand - not completely Gan Eden (Paradise), but three-quarters of the way there! He pictures himself calm and comfortable, and then he thinks of himself as living on the 19th floor, with a view of the sea. He keeps thinking, and as he is about to buy it, he really thinks that this is how it will be. What's his error? He thinks he is lacking this expensive sofa, lacking the apartment on the 19th floor with a view of the sea, and thinks that if he gets it all, he can see the waves from above, and live in a charming world. But really, one should stop himself and think, "My situation now is better than that. I don't want it, because the peace I have will be robbed from me once I want this object." At that time, he will discover a deep peace in the soul, stronger than the peace of the 19th floor apartment with the view of the sea.

Most people don't know this peace. Whenever a desire comes, either they try to fill it, or if not, it's not because they feel whole without it, but because they can't have it, due to lack of funds. "I don't have the means, so I can't deal with it, but if I would have the means, I would certainly buy it!" So the person still desires, but he can't act upon the desire. It's not that he deeply realizes that "if I remove the desire, I will discover a more happy and peaceful world inside me."

The normal attitude we see in the world is a terribly faulty system. If a person will believe that he is created as a neshamah, which is very good and lacks nothing, he will not need to add anything. He doesn't need to acquire other things or expand the desires. I must believe that my current state, due to my very formation, is a perfect condition. If it's a perfect condition, why would I want to exchange something perfect for a sofa? Why would I exchange something perfect for an apartment on the 19th floor near the sea? What is more perfect: the Divine soul in a person, of which the Creator testifies that it is very good, or an apartment on the 19th floor? Certainly, the neshamah is more perfect. In general, though, a person doesn't know this, or even if he does, how many people experience it? A person is liable to make this simple calculation: "If I won't desire, I won't feel happy. On the other hand, the illusion of sitting on the 19th floor near the sea calms me."

If one doesn't know what it's like to stop desiring and feel the inner perfect feeling, he in fact is very convinced that the desire and its fulfillment will really help him. But this is only because he never experienced an inner world beyond the world of the desires. If we will consider our lives a little, we will see that we run from one ratzon to the next. A person wakes up in the morning, davens, and then runs right to work. Why does he work? Either so he won't be bored, or so he'll have a livelihood. He is always busy with filling his desires. Is there one moment in the day in which he wants nothing? He always wants something, the question is what. At one moment, one wants to spend time with his children, at another time, he wants to work for a livelihood, at another time he wants to eat, and then to rest a little, but all day is about "What do I want, and how do I get it?"

Alternatively, there are desires that one must forgo because he can't fulfill them. A person is busy from morning to night chasing out his desires. Not that one is always conscious of his desires and how to actualize them, because he is already used to not thinking. Occasionally, a person will consider his desires. This is naturally in one's subconscious, each person according to his situation, and one is controlled by the desires. A person desires, and his whole life is about to actualize these desires and dreams.

We must change the "diskette" of life, and instead of thinking about how to fulfill the desires, we should take them all, and throw them into the sea. There is an entirely different way to live. Instead of meeting a desire by giving up if it's unattainable and pursuing it when attainable, one must consider each desire: Without filling the desire, can I not live? Will I suffer, because I won't be able to live a minimal, normal life? When it becomes clear that this is not the case, which is how it usually is, because these are just desires for luxury, a person must contemplate deeply: "When I won't want the thing, I will be more complete than if I want and carry it out into actuality."

Certainly, a person cannot take on all of life and nullify all his desires at once. But a person needs to get used to thinking about life with a completely different orientation. We are in a world with enticements from morning to night: there are advertisements on the street and on the buses, and everyone tries to convince us of the same basic idea: "If you will only buy this thing, you will feel totally different. This is all you are missing! It's worthwhile to invest a little and put forth the effort of being in overdraft for two months. Go ahead, get into it! Once you have the object, the overdraft won't bother you." But the truth is that a person must close his eyes to the world and believe that "I have within me a greater treasury than the entire world and all its wondrous objects. I have a treasure that can make me calm and happy. Happiness does not reside in things that are external to a person, as our teacher, the Rambam says. The happiness is within; that is where there is true pleasure, joy and peace. But how are these revealed? Only if a person knows he is a soul, which is absolutely perfect, and that the one factor that destroys this joy is the desire for things.

If a person would be offered a pill that has the ability to change him from happy to sad, would he take it? No one would want such a pill. But there is such a pill in the world. It is taken tens of times each day, and it is called ratzon (desire). People want and want and want. As we said, "ratzon" is based on the word "ritzah," which means to run. Where does one run? This is like a person in a king's palace who has the keys to the king's treasuries, and he runs away and quickly escapes from it! He just wants to run away from the palace and its treasures. He somehow created an ideology that life is all about escaping from the king's treasures! He doesn't even have time to explain to people why he's running, because he is so busy escaping the treasures.

We are now in the king's treasury, by virtue of the soul within each of us! We have an ideology, though, to escape from the neshamah, to escape from the treasury! This ideology chokes us from birth to death, unless one has had the chance to stop and change the "diskette."

We are in a world that totally pulls us to desires. We want children, we want them to grow up so we can enjoy them, we want to relax, we want money, we want and want and want. If a person would take a pen and paper and just write down all the things he wants, I would recommend that he prepare seven pages. One wants without limit. But all these desires are the key to the destruction of a person! They uproot one's natural joy and place him in a world of darkness.

Chazal give this very advice, as follows: "Eat bread with salt, and drink a measured amount of water, sleep on the ground, and live a life of suffering. If you do so, you will be happy in this world, and in a good state in the next world." Anyone who sees this Mishnah is amazed: Happy in this world? I understand that he will be well in the next world, because he did mitzvos and learned Torah, so he deserves reward in that future time. He suffered here for the future reward, and that was his approach. But the Mishnah doesn't say that, it says, "Happy in this world!" If it wouldn't have said, "live a life of suffering," we could understand. But the Mishnah says, "live a life of suffering," and then testifies that "happy are you in this world"? What joy is there in this world in this way? Why do we need this way? "Eat bread with salt, and drink a measured amount of water"? I have enough money; my father earns 7,000 a month. Why should one be satisfied with little?

The answer is as we have said until now. A person thinks that if he takes another candy, it will be good in the palate and he will feel calm. But what is this like? A person takes a nail and bangs it in the wall to hang a picture. But he bangs so hard that the whole wall collapses. A person thinks he's just adding to his life. He'll add a picture and have a drop more pleasure. But the small nail completely destroyed the wall. What can one candy do the person? It seems that it can do nothing, or close to nothing, even from a nutritional point of view. No doctor will say that if a person eats one time a food that is not perfectly nutritious, it will hurt him so much. So what is the root of the problem? The problem is not that he eats, but that he desires. The fact that he wants things other than his true existence drives him away from the king's palace. He is running away from the palace his entire life, and no longer has hope of attaining the palace and the treasure.

We have not come to talk about theories of spirituality. We are talking about being happy in this world! We must understand that happiness and pleasure have a different "recipe." The recipe is totally different than the one we are used to. If one has no awareness of an inner treasure, he will seek it outside. But once one does discover it, he will not run around. This is like buying an armchair for relaxation and then, never enjoying it, but running to buy more and more armchairs. We have happiness, pleasure, and peace, but we must first believe that they exists, and then to connect to them.

We have explained the theory thus far, and now we will show daily practical applications. A person wakes up in the morning and realizes that there was a strong wind that knocked over an expensive vase during the night, because he forgot to shut the window. The vase is finished. The damage is significant to him, not just because of its cash value, but because this was his only heirloom from his grandmother. On that day, the person will not be very happy. But what is the proper perspective? The vase is worth 80 shekel, the fact that it was an heirloom had given a nice feeling of nostalgia. But it a person were given two choices: either you live without the vase, or you die, but the vase can remain intact in the house, what would he choose? He would know that the vase is a vase, Grandmother is Grandmother, and it's all precious, but my life is more precious.

If a person doesn't contemplate, he thinks: what is the connection between life and my interest in the vase? Will one desire destroy my entire life? I want life and the vase as well! But when a person stops and considers: the very act of entering a process of desires is suicidal! Hashem told Adam, "On the day you eat from it, you will die," but he didn't die then! He lived a thousand years (actually 930, because he gave 70 to David HaMelech). Rather, the very fact of his desire was part of death. All of life after that was a process of self-destruction through desires. If a person is aware that even when he wants a small thing, he is directly creating a process of suicide, he will say, "I would rather there never was a vase to desire; I don't want to lose my life." If so, when he wakes up and sees the broken vase on the floor, other than the practical work of taking a broom to sweep up the broken pieces of glass, he stops and thinks, "Will I uproot the state of not wanting, in which I can connect to my inner world, just for a vase? It's not worth it!" He forgoes his desire, and returns to be at peace.

This attitude must describe a person throughout his whole life. Obviously, the example of the vase is just a small example. A person may be driving on the road, and he sees smoke coming out the engine. He manages to get out, but he was almost in mortal danger. Just the previous day, the warranty expired. He didn't have a chance to renew it, and said that one day won't make a difference. Now it's gone, and he's out 50,000 shekel. The normal reaction would be, "50,000 shekel! Where will I get the money? 50,000 shekel in one moment! If only yesterday, I would have renewed the warranty, I would get the money." But we might ask the person, "If you would know that chas veshalom, you have an illness in the kidneys, and surgery costs 50,000 shekels, would you spend it, or not?" The answer is that he would rush to spend the money for this! Life, after all, is more valuable than 50,000 shekel. But one who doesn't think will say, "What connection is there between being upset at a 50,000 shekel loss and the loss of life? I want to live, but I also want the car to start working again." A person should just calmly think, "If I now enter the process of wanting 50,000 shekel, I have entered a life of desires, and in this way, I uproot the entire inner content of my life. What is better? To give up on the 50,000 shekel and not want them, or to lose real life because of this money? Of course, I prefer the inner treasury within me."

This is no mere slogan. This is tried and tested by people that really worked with it. Each week, and even each day, each of us experiences events, that, to say the least, are not to his liking. No one can say that a week went by exactly as planned. One wakes up in the morning and the baby is sick, so he can't go to work, or the car won't move and he needs it towed to the garage, or the neighbor has begun renovations and he can't fall asleep at night. Everyone has countless stories, and each of us knows his own life. But if a person will adopt this way of thinking, anytime there is an event that is even slightly disturbing, or there is some small desire that did not come to pass (like Chazal's example of wanting to pull out one coin from the pocket and another one came up), even if it is the most trivial interest, he should acknowledge it, and say to himself, "Why did I feel this unpleasant feeling? Because my desire was not actualized. Is this desire worthy of uprooting my whole life?

At first, it does seem just like a slogan, because when he nullifies the will, he cannot feel the pleasure on the other side. There is no immediate result: "I stopped the desire and now I feel the greatest happiness and pleasure in the world, and I don't want anything else." Therefore, at first, one needs to have a certain level of faith: "I believe that I have a soul inside me. I believe that the pleasure is found inside of me." When a person does believe, and he acts according to this basic faith, gradually, he will reach a particular stage of a weakening of desire, and he will suddenly sense a new source of pleasure.

Here is a simple example: As long as a person doesn't have children, he cannot understand the joy of children. Only once you have them, can you understand this. That is to say, a new source of pleasure cannot be understood until you enter into it. So, too, as long as a person has not entered the world without desires, he has no place in the soul to understand what this means. "What is a world without desires? What pleasure is there?" But it is only felt when experienced firsthand. If one has not married, he does not know what it means to stand under the chuppah (wedding canopy). He may have been at 200 ceremonies, but he didn't experience it, and he doesn't really know what it is. He can understand it intellectually, and perhaps even give a lecture about it, but it will all be "from the lips and outward." Only one who weds knows the experience of getting married under the chuppah.

So, too, in our case. As long as one has not gotten used to living in the world of "not wanting," he doesn't understand the joy that is contained there. And if he does understand, he doesn't sense it. But when he will start to sense it, he will realize that it is worthwhile to forgo all desires just to receive this inner source of incomparable pleasure.

This world is a world of desires, and our Sages have aptly said, "Die before you die." That means to kill your desires, not as an end in itself, for it is not the goal, but because "I understand that my natural state is one of joy. I was born joyous, and that is my essence. What uproots the joy? The desires. So as not to lose the inner joy, pleasure, and peace, I will forgo the desires for this deeper pleasure."

When you think about it, you'll see that the fears we have in life are because we want and want and want. I am not saying that all fears come from superfluous desires, because there are certainly fears that relate to the will to live, and to forgo that, one would need to be on a very high level. But my advice relates to the daily desires that relate to most people. The fears are due to all the desires in the soul, and a person is afraid that he will lose them. We have so many desires. Either we work to fulfill them, or when we meet an obstacle, we fear that we will not be able to fulfill them. But if a person thinks deeply and agrees to forgo the matter, he will fear no longer. He has already given up on it, so there is nothing left to fear. In truth, it is best to even give up on life in this world, so as not to lose the neshamah. If a person has true faith that after death there is a world of pleasure, he will not even fear dying. Understandably, this does not relate to most people. But if a person would think deeply, he would not even be afraid of death, not because of stubbornness or insensitivity, but because of a recognition that a desire fulfilled is less pleasurable than the desire not existing.

We must know that the inner force in the soul is the will. If a person corrects the root, all the faults disappear. When he corrects the root, he enters a world of joy and pleasure. When a person does not correct the root, he builds life on a wrong foundation, and it is very difficult to continue and improve.

We have just discussed a very fundamental point about the soul. The nullification of the will is the key to a perfect life, it is the key to a happy life, unlike the common impression. All the troubles we see in the world are because of people's desires. In each place, there are people with desires, and just as their faces are unique, so are their views and desires unique. How many people want to be Knesset members? How much dispute is behind all of this? What would happen if those 120 people, that is to say, the 1200 that want to be there, would nullify their wills? There would be peace and tranquility in the country, besides the millions of shekalim they would save. We would not have all the politics and the strife.

Wherever there is a building with several occupants, if there are five occupants, there are seven opinions. Each person wants something else, and wants his desire to prevail, if not by consent, then by force. In this world, everyone has desires; some relate only to the individual, and are not very harmful to others, but some people have very big aspirations, such as being the prime minister, mayor, or head of the city counsel, and then, how many people will they trample on the way? The world becomes one big calamity because each person has his desire, and he guides his life accordingly. He builds his personal will, and tries to make the whole world conform to his will. "I want this, he wants that," and this is where war starts in the world. If people would have worked on nullifying their wills, there would never have been a single war in history! But each person has a will, which he nurtures, and when he meets an opposing will, he nurtures his own will even more, until the state is as we see now in the world.

The total reform for the whole world, not just the individual, is for people to discover a state in which they want nothing! Of the future, it says, "And the wolf will live with the sheep. Why? Because if the wolf has no desire, the sheep can live with it. But when the wolf has desire, in half a minute, he'll tear the sheep apart. As long as we have desires, we are - with your forgiveness - wolves! One tears apart the other! It is hard to survive in such a world. Everything is about power, force, and wars. Who can feel secure in Israel, because someone in Iran has a roach in his head? Who knows what the world will still undergo? Have we not undergone enough? And what is this all from? From the desires of a few people, who want to destroy half a world because of their desires!

A person thinks that if he would conquer half the world, or be king over half the world, or be president of the United States, he would then be happy. I invite the president to come here and tell me if he is really happy. He cannot sleep at night because of worries. "Are my poll numbers rising, or falling? If there is a war, what will people say? Will it strengthen my position, or weaken me?" But who cares about how many people will die? He must always be concerned and nervous. Yet does anyone have a higher aspiration than becoming the president of the United States? It is the highest office in the world! But is that where joy and pleasure can be found? But if before a person would begin his campaign, he would change the "diskette" and decide he doesn't want it, he could sit peacefully by the Atlantic Ocean with more peace of mind than he has now. Yet the world is built differently, based on people's desires. That is the whole system. It guides the whole world, and destroys it.

We have earlier spoken a lot about correcting our emotions and finding balance. We worked with a few different methods, but here, we have reached the deepest point of all. If a person will nullify his wills, he will rectify all the emotions. If he can successfully quiet the will, he will have a commensurate degree of peace in life. Generally, a person who wants honor explodes when he doesn't receive it. But if from the beginning, he says, "I don't need your honor," he will be calm from the start. If one sees that the problems in life and the world come from the desires, and will weed out the bad root, he will reach, with the help of Hashem, the depth of his soul, inner true peace, and the complete joy of life.

 

Basic points that emerged from the question and answer period:

 

  • 1) The only will one really needs to cultivate is to not destroy the self. Then, a person will naturally have all the proper feelings that were planted inside him.
  • 2) The reason a person is inherently joyous is that he is created close to Hashem, and since with Hashem there is no lack and "strength and joy are in His place," the soul has that feeling as well. With no lack, there can be no sadness.
  • 3) A lack of desire does not mean that a person should not work or accomplish; or course, he must. But one must not be fixed on only one way of doing things. He should be open to all reasonable possibilities. Just as one doesn't care which taxi he will take to the next city, so should one be open to more than one way of earning a livelihood.
  • 4) After the sin of Adam, desire entered the world, and there became a need for people to engage in physical work. When Mashiach will come, Hashem will

be revealed, desire will disappear, and we will not need physical work.

  • 5) Not everyone is on this level. Often, you must deal with someone on his current level of need, such as to give a luxury to a wealthy person who has lost money and feels he really needs this luxury, because he became used to it, and is not on the level to forgo it.
  • 6) There are many desires that we cannot nullify in our current state, such as the desire to eat. But one must nullify the desires that are clearly unnecessary, and then he will understand which desires can or cannot be nullified. One can treat this like weight lifting. One cannot know his limits until he experiments.
  • 7) We must empathize with others, but not to the extent that we focus on people's suffering so much that it destroys us. Along with feeling for someone, we must remember that Hashem sent the event for a good reason. Even an ill person himself is encouraged not to focus on his own pain, and that is why people bring musicians and such to the hospitals to cheer up the patients.
  • 8) Suffering does not need to come with sadness. A woman bears a child for nine months, and she suffers plenty, but because she appreciates the value of it all, she is happy in her suffering.
  • 9) A person must pray for a need that he still wants, but if he has transcended the desire, he doesn't have to pray for it, because he doesn't want it any more. The Tefillos (prayers) are formulated in the plural, because we must want the desires of others to be fulfilled, but we personally do not need these desires. If a person has an interest that he is not ready to nullify, he should deal with it and not suppress it prematurely.
  • 10)This avodah can only start if one has successfully worked with the previous teachings. He must identify himself as a neshamah and really sense that the body is a garment, and then, he can progress. Then, when a desire presents itself, he should realize that he doesn't want to destroy the neshamah for the desire. After doing this 20 or 30 times, one will feel the neshamah well.

 
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The Rav's seforim are available in bookstores in the United States, Canada and Israel
IN USA & CANADA
SHIRAH Seforim Distributors | 4116 16th Avenue, Brooklyn, NY 11204 | Phone 718.871.8652 | e-mail shirah@thejnet.com
IN ISRAEL Sifrei Meah Shearim | 15 Mea Shearim Street | 02.502.2567
TO ORDER ONLINE IN THE USA (all the Rav's seforim) www.nehora.com or www.mysefer.com
INTERNATIONAL ORDERS Sifrei Meah Shearim | 15 Mea Shearim Street | 02.502.2567 | e-mail: Sifrei Meah Shearim
: | 15| 02.502.2567

: | 5 | 03.579.3829

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